So last night after my post, I shut down my computer and then decided that I did in fact want to get myself off. I didn't want to use my vibrator and needed some stimulation from outside my imagination, so I grabbed my phone and discovered that, yes- it does access porn websites! Albeit it rather delayed and pixelated, but enough for an already very aroused me to manage to give myself a pretty strong orgasm just by playing with my clit for a couple of minutes.
I still had sex dreams though! Three of them- involving three different people:
1). The ex: hot, passionate sex- him on top, my legs around his shoulders. I really miss the way he fucked me.
2). A friend, whom don't actually see sexually at all, but he's recently started seeing another friend of mine so I think my subconscious is just a little confused by that. Even in my dream I remember thinking "but we're just friends". It was sex in the spooning position, and we joked about it afterwards. Strange.
3). The other ex- Person 1 from Shoot, Fuck, Marry. This was a really strange dream. It was good sex, he fucked me from all different angles. But then it got weird- he wanted commitment and my entire family decided to walk into the room while we were fucking, and there was a vibrator involved somewhere along the line there, too.
Needless to say, woke up pretty confused and also mildly horny.
So I did meet Person 1 today, which was actually surprisingly good! He's a lot more talkative than he used to be, and I actually enjoyed hanging out with him. He's just come out of a serious relationship- which, when I did the maths, actually overlapped with the time when we were seeing each other. I actually just found this hilarious, however, because I was seeing someone else at the time too. And we were never actually committed to each other. However if I had known at the time that he was with someone else, there is no way that I would have been with him.
I remember once we were at the beach, and we swam into this little cave that was half under water. We got very hot and heavy, he was fucking me with his fingers, and then I went down on him until he came. It was a hot day, and the waves were splashing us around, and it was all just really fucking intense. I wouldn't mind fucking him again, just to see what he's like in bed, now that I know what I'm doing. I don't think his ex ever slept with him, because of religious reasons, so I'm pretty sure I'm still the only person he's fucked. However at the moment I just want to keep in touch every now and then, with no ulterior motives or expectations and just take it from there. I don't want to end up in a relationship with him, particularly seeing as he's clearly the kind of guy who cheats, and I have a feeling he might be looking for a relationship. So if things do start to go down the track of 'beyond friendship', I'm going to have to be honest.
Also I broached the subject of bi-sexuality, and he didn't seem overly OK with it. It may have just been the shock factor, and not knowing how to react. But if he's not OK with my sexuality then I don't want him in my life. So I'm going to have to suss that one out.
He was fun to mess around with though, back in the day, and now that we seem to get along better than we used to I couldn't help but let my mind wander on my way home from seeing him... We didn't have all that much sex because we were both virgins when we met... But I have gone down on this guy in so many ridiculous places- by the river in the city, near the docks, at the beach, in a toilet at a bar.... And once we fucked in the car in front of a school! Probably not the wisest idea, but as horny kids we had nowhere to go, really.
God damn it I'm horny as I write this. I just want someone to burst into my room, put their hand across my mouth and tell me not to make a sound, then proceed to fuck me wildly and violently- squeezing my nipples, biting my neck, smacking my ass and pounding me from behind.
I never realised I was into ass-play until my ex fingered my ass while he fucked me. This then became a favourite move of ours. It's just so dirty and taboo that the idea of it alone just turns me the fuck on.
I'd love to have a guy fuck me in the ass while I fuck my pussy with my vibrator. Add another guy gagging me with his cock and I'm pretty satisfied. Maybe a chick touching herself while she watches, waiting for the point where the guys order me to go down on her and fuck her tight little pussy with my tongue, while they continue to grab their rock-hard dicks until they come all over us both.
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